No matter where you work, certain types of coworkers are always there. Some are harmless, some are mildly annoying, and some make you question every life choice that led you to this job.

Let’s break down the usual suspects you’ll find in any office:

1. The “Reply All” Enthusiast

This person firmly believes that every email requires a group response. Even if the email says “Thanks!”, they will respond with “Thanks, everyone!”—forcing an unnecessary notification onto 47 people.

Worst case? They attach a 12MB file and crash everyone’s inbox.

2. The Phantom Employee

You know they work here. You’ve seen their name on the org chart. But where are they? Do they actually exist?

They’re always “working remotely” but never online, never in meetings, and somehow still getting paid. If you spot them in the office, take a picture—it’s rarer than Bigfoot.

3. The Microwave Menace

This person brings the most offensive-smelling lunch imaginable and nukes it at full power for the entire office to suffer.

Fish? Of course. Leftover eggs? Why not. Some mystery meal that smells like sadness? You bet.

Bonus points if they walk away and let the beeping continue for an extra five minutes.

4. The Meeting Addict

This coworker believes everything requires a meeting. A simple question? “Let’s schedule a quick sync.” A minor update? “Let’s touch base.”

Before you know it, your entire week is blocked off with brainstorming sessions, check-ins, and alignment meetings—all for something that could’ve been a two-line email.

5. The Walking Wikipedia

They know everything about everything, and they won’t stop talking about it.

• You mention getting coffee? They lecture you on the history of caffeine.
• You sneeze? Here comes a 20-minute TED Talk on the immune system.
• You say it’s hot outside? Prepare for a deep dive into global climate change statistics.

They are never wrong, and Google is their best friend.

6. The Overly Motivated Employee

They show up early, stay late, and actually love their job. You, meanwhile, are just trying to survive.

• “Isn’t this project exciting?” No.
• “I was thinking about work over the weekend!” Can’t relate.
• “I just LOVE the company culture!” Blink twice if you need help.

This person is either getting paid way more than you or they are running on pure delusion.

7. The Chaos Gremlin

This coworker never reads emails, always forgets deadlines, and somehow manages to thrive in total disorganization.

Yet, nothing bad ever happens to them. They show up late, miss meetings, and somehow still get promoted.

Meanwhile, you submit one report five minutes late and HR schedules a “quick chat.”

Which One Are You?

Every office has these people, and let’s be honest, you might even be one of them. (If you microwave fish at work, we know it’s you.)

Which type of coworker do you have? Or which one are you? Drop your answer in the comments (anonymously, of course 😉).